Abide – Ignatius of Loyola
Welcome everyone, and welcome to Abide.
We're here to find our spaces of prayer. Whether it's your room with the door closed, or even in an open space with many people around, and you have your headset on, and you can gaze out a window, or take a walk.
We're carving out this time because we care about God. And we want to honour Him with our lives. We want to grow. And we want to be centred in who He is, and for His glory. So let me read you a quote to start, from Eugene Peterson, in a book called ‘Take and Read,’ and this is a chapter about his reflections on the Saints.
“All of us have impulses, from time to time, to live a holy life. Life lived as it should be. Life true, and good, and beautiful. Life lived for, and in, and by means of our Creator, Redeemer, and Sanctifier. And then someone telephones, with an invitation to the hockey game, or we notice that the salad needs oregano, or the crabgrass in the lawn suddenly becomes a pressing priority. We are distracted by the mundane and forfeit, for yet another time, the holy, or so we assume. And then we find ourselves in the company of a writer, or writers, who penetrate the surface pieties and show us what the holy life is really like. That
is, it is the hockey game, and the oregano, and the crabgrass, that provide the raw material for holiness. Holiness is not being nice. A holy life isn't a matter of men and women being polite with God, but of humans who accept and enter into God's work of shaping salvation out of the unlikely materials of our sin and ignorance, our ambition and waywardness, also our loves and aspirations and nobilities, but never by smoothing over our rough edges. Holiness is not polish.”
I'm encouraged by our brother, Eugene Peterson, and how he reminds us that these Saints that we're reading about are encouraging us to live fully in our lives, knowing that in each part of our day, God is present.
Today, we get to spend time with Saint Ignatius of Loyola. I would say one of his most famous ways, or words, or themes, is that we can find God in all things. So that's what we're going to practice doing today as we reflect, as we listen, as I read.
So, I'm going to allow us, first, to just practice quieting our bodies. We're going to take in some slow breaths together, and some slow exhales together. And in between the breaths, I'm just going to read some lyrics from the artist ‘I Am Son,’ and the song is ‘Always with Me.’
So, let's all breathe in together. And breathe out.
“I can make it through the day when You're with me on the way. In my heart and mind, You'll stay. I can make it through the night when I'm clinging to Your light. You will make the darkness bright. For You are always, always with me. For You are always, always with me.”
Breathe in. Breathe out.
“In the calm and in the storm, when it seems I'm all alone, it's Your hand I find to hold. In each hour of unrest, when it seems I've nothing left, You speak peace in every breath. For You are always, always with me. For You are always, always with me.”
Breathing in. Breathing out.
“In the morning, in the evening, when I'm waking, when I'm sleeping, when I'm arriving, when I'm leaving, you will have me in Your keeping. Even from my mother's womb, never hidden from Your view, I was always known to You. When I fade away in death, You will catch my final breath. You will take me to my rest. For You are always, always with me. For You are always, always with me.”
Breathing in. Breathing out.
Just settling more and more into this space. The safe space of God's embrace, and love, and knowledge of each and every one of us. And that we get to sit in this space, and listen, and learn, and allow the Spirit to direct and guide. It's good to be near God.
And today, Ignatius will sit with us. We're going to make a new friend. He's really exciting to get to know, and very human, and I'm just excited to read about him and reflect upon his words, and for them to continue to change our lives.
So, we'll begin with our story. Again, I'm reading from ‘Stories of the Saints’ by Kerry Wallace. And this is the life of St. Ignatius of Loyola, living from 1491 to 1556.
“Inigo loved to strut around the Spanish court, tossing his cape to reveal the chainmail he wore as a Spanish soldier, and show off the sword and dagger at his waist. He also loved fancy clothes, and to dance and gamble, and to read the stories of romantic warriors in tales about El Cid and Camelot. But he was also a good soldier. All the men he led loved and respected him. And in ten years of fighting, he had never been injured once. That all changed at the fortress of Pamplona. Inigo and his company were defending the fort from a French attack, and Inigo was right at the head of the Spanish force. During the battle, a cannonball was shot between Inigo's legs, and it tore his left leg open and broke his right
one. When Inigo's men saw he was injured, they surrendered to the French. But the French were so impressed by Inigo's bravery that they carried him on a stretcher all the way back to his hometown. Back home in the castle where he had grown up, Inigo went through terrible operations to fix his shattered leg. After months of pain, the doctors were able to patch Inigo up, so he could walk. But one of his legs would always be shorter than the other, which meant he could never be a soldier again. During those long days Inigo spent in the hospital, he asked for books filled with the adventure stories he loved to read. But the
hospital didn't have any. Instead, they gave him the Bible and stories of the Saints. As Inigo read them, he noticed something. When he read adventure stories, he felt empty. But when he read stories of God and the Saints, he felt peace. So when Inigo could walk again, he went to the monastery at Montserrat. He gave away his fine clothes to a poor man he met there. And he stayed up all night, praying before a statue of Mary carved from black stone. At the end of the night, he hung up his sword and dagger beside the statue, and he left behind his old life forever. A woman showed him a cave nearby where he could pray.
And for the next year, Inigo lived there, praying and fasting, and serving at a hospital for the poor. In the cave, Inigo pondered the stories he knew about Jesus. But he didn't just think about them; he imagined what it had been like if he had been there himself. He imagined seeing Jesus feed five thousand people with only a few fish and loaves of bread. He imagined watching Jesus welcome the children who ran to him, and seeing Jesus open the eyes of a man who had been born blind. Inigo wondered what he would have seen and heard if he'd been there, and how he would have felt. But he also struggled with fears and
doubts. ‘Do you really think you can follow God as long as you live? The devil whispered to him. ‘Can you promise me even one hour of life?’ Indigo answered. At this, the devil slunk away. Even though he chased the devil off that day, Indigo still had spiritual struggles. Sometimes he felt no joy or comfort at all, no matter how much he prayed or went to church, searching for God. But as he prayed, he started to realise that God was always there with him, even in the dark cave. And he realised that God spoke to him through both his hopes and his fears, and all his other emotions. If he thought about the things he felt,
and why he felt them, he learned things about himself, and the world, and God. Inigo started to write these things down as a book, which he called ‘Spiritual Exercises’, to help other people listen for unexpected ways that God might speak. And he realised that if he wanted to teach people about God, he needed to learn a few things himself. Because he'd always been a soldier, he never bothered to study much. So, when he went back to school to start his basic studies, he wound up in classes with boys and girls who were only eight, or ten, or twelve years old. Several years later, he was finally ready to attend a university in Spain. And when he wasn't taking classes, he and his friends loved to talk about God, and
Inigo started to lead his friends in the spiritual exercises he had discovered in his cave. ‘We should speak to God as a friend speaks to a friend,’ he said, ‘or as a servant to a master.’ ‘We should ask Him for favours and admit our faults, and tell Him everything that concerns us; our fears and our hopes, and we should ask for His guidance, in everything.’ But the leaders of the Spanish church weren't pleased that Inigo was teaching about God before he finished school. They had him arrested, and when Inigo was set free, he went to a different town in Spain, and he got locked up for teaching about God there, too. Finally,
Inigo went to a university in Paris. He didn't know French, so he had to start his studies all over, in a new language. Six years later, he earned his degree in theology. He'd begun his education as a full-grown man, in a classroom full of boys. For over a decade, he hadn't given up, even when he had to begin again in a whole new language. Finally, he was a priest, so people began to call him Ignatius, the Latin form of his name. In Paris, Ignatius and his friends formed a group that called themselves ‘Friends in the Lord’ and ‘The Society of Jesus.’ They decided to go to Rome to ask the Pope if he would let them start
their own religious order. Most religious orders had vows of poverty, chastity, and obedience. But, ‘The Society of Jesus’ added another vow, to do whatever the Pope asked them, and go wherever he said. The Pope blessed their order, and Ignatius's friends tried to elect him as the leader. ‘I don't think I'm worthy,’ he said. ‘I didn't lead a good life, and other people know so much more than I do.’ But his friends wouldn't take no for an answer, and finally Ignatius accepted. In Rome, Ignatius wrote the rules for their order, which were like the disciplines Ignatius knew from his days as a soldier. ‘Hurry to any part of the world where your neighbours need us,’ he told his friends, ‘and serve them without harsh words
and without looking down on them for their mistakes.’ People started calling Ignatius and his friends the Jesuits, a shorter nickname for ‘The Society of Jesus.’ And the Jesuits spread over the whole world, founding schools, while Ignatius built a network of love across the miles by sending thousands of letters. By the time Ignatius died as an old man, there were one thousand Jesuits, and they had started thirty-five schools. And today, Ignatius' Society of Jesus serves people in hundreds of schools all over the world. And hundreds of thousands of people have read the ‘Little Book of Spiritual Exercises’ Ignatius started to
write all alone in his cave.”
Allow yourself to just sit with Ignatius, and with Jesus, and just soaking in his story, the story that Jesus authored and perfected.
I'm going to gently touch on a few parts of his story and allow some of the words to mingle in our own stories. The start of the story of Ignatius begins with him as a strong soldier. And then it all changes when he gets hit by the cannonball and is in the hospital. And he's been given a book to read. He'd rather read an adventure story, but there's only a Bible and books of the saints. And this is where he encounters God.
And it's important, you know, as we've been studying the Saints, each Saint encounters God in a different kind of way. You know, for St. Francis, it's when he met a leper, and saw that sickness and gave him his coat. Or St. Claire, she heard Francis preach and was just taken, and decided to marry God after that, and get into a wedding dress. And then there's St. Catherine, who we read last time, and from a young age, she saw a vision of Christ, and she was forever changed. And here we have Ignatius, and his wounding and his reading. And so, each of us have different stories of how we've encountered God. And it's important to notice what your story has been like. If it's been gradual, if it's come at a young age, if it
came through heartache or an injury, came through listening to messages. Spend a moment just soaking in your story.
We read that Ignatius imagined what it would have been like to have been in these stories with Jesus, and that he imagined seeing Jesus feed the five thousand. He imagined watching Jesus welcome the children, or seeing Jesus open the eyes of the man who was born blind. So, Ignatius really wanted to use his senses. He didn't want to just read when he read the scriptures.
Gloria Hutchinson, in her book ‘Six Ways to Pray from Six Great Saints,' writes this about Ignatius and his imagination.
“His belief that our senses can provide us with the passage into the mysteries of Christ's life. They can enable us to experience the history of salvation in the present tense. Ignatius isn't satisfied with thinking about the passion. He or she must be present at the crucifixion, alive to the sights, sounds, smells, and feelings of the event. Merely to read is to miss the boat. Ignatius demands in5volvement of the whole person.”
So, I just want to inspire you, and encourage you and myself, when we read the scriptures, to slow it down, to breathe it in, to engage our senses, and to really encounter the different people, situations, and conditions that the scriptures are providing for us. This is one of Ignatius's greatest desires: is for us to embody the scriptures with our senses, not just our minds.
Our story today reads, “Inigo started to write these thoughts down as a book, which he called ‘Spiritual Exercises,’ to help other people listen for unexpected ways that God might speak.”
So, Ignatius's biggest written work is called 'The Spiritual Exercises,’ and it's basically a book written for retreat leaders to guide others through a four-week period, where you would focus on scripture readings, and time for prayer and meditation. And each week, there would be a different theme and focus. And so, if there were four weeks, the first week would be focused on sin and God's mercy. The second week, the life of Jesus and how we are to imitate Him. The third week, Jesus's passion and death. And the fourth week, Christ's resurrection. And this is a beautiful opportunity. I was able to do this twenty or so
years ago, when my husband and I lived in Scotland, and I had a spiritual director to guide me through these exercises. And I'd highly encourage you to even investigate or researct this possibility in your life, at some point. And just listening to this podcast, and your desire to know these Saints, is already showing that this is a path that you are seeking after. The start of ‘The Spiritual Exercises’ is one of the greatest, greatest set of words, and I often read this to myself each day in the morning, as I start my day. And so, I thought I'd read it for us today. It's called ‘The First Principle and Foundation.’ And this is written in ‘The
Spiritual Exercises’ number twenty-three.
“The goal of my life is to live with God forever. God, who loves me, gave me life. My own response of love allows God's life to flow into me, without limit. All the things in this world are gifts of God, presented to me so that I can know God more easily and make a return of love more readily. As a result, I appreciate and use all these gifts of God, insofar as they help me develop as a loving person. But if any of these gifts become the centre of my life, they displace God, and so they hinder my growth toward my goal. In everyday life, then, we must hold ourselves in balance before all of these created gifts, insofar as we have a choice, and are not bound by some obligation. We should not fix our desires on health or sickness, wealth or poverty, success or failure, a long life or a short one. For everything has the potential of calling forth, in us, a deeper response to our life in God. Our only desire and our one choice should be this: I want, and I choose, what better leads to the deepening of God's life, in me.”
These words are full of goodness. And bringing all of my needs, desires, thoughts, into alignment each day, each morning. So, I'm thankful for Ignatius and his work. Lastly, we read in our story of Ignatius, “’ We should speak to God as a friend speaks to a friend,’ he said, ‘or as a servant to a master.’ ‘We should ask him for favours, and admit our faults, and tell him everything that concerns us; our fears and our hopes, and we should ask him for guidance in everything.’”
Ignatius is always, is also known for the ‘Prayer of Examine,’ which is a prayer that I pray at night. Often, I like to be away from my phone for the first hour of the morning and the last hour of the day. And these are times that I can really focus and be more attentive to what God's going to do in a day, or what He has done. And so, in closing, I'm just going to walk you through the five steps of this 'Prayer of Examine' that Ignatius wrote. And allow yourself to talk to Jesus in a way that a friend talks to a friend.
And so, step one is just to become aware that God's presence is with you.
And then step two is just to give thanks. Just to reflect, in gratitude, on what this day has brought you. Whether it's beauty, words, phrases, experiences. You can give thanks to God now.
And then you can review your day with the feelings you had. Feelings of joy, or frustration, or boredom, or impatience, and just to notice what God might be saying to you through these different emotions and feelings.
Step four is to ask for forgiveness and healing. Where we can identify moments where we felt distant from God, or we made some mistakes, or we need healing from God. And then, lastly, you look to tomorrow, and you ask for guidance, wisdom, and strength for the day ahead.
So, friends, as we close this time, I just invite you to, if you're able, to put your hands on your heart. Feel your breath as your chest lifts. And then descends. Just be reminded that God is so near, in every part of your day, everything that you love, and in everything that you're challenged with. That He cares. And that He wants to walk it with you. And so be blessed with the company of Christ, with the company of Inigo. And go in peace to love and serve God.
Amen.
